You had an interesting and telling interaction the other day.
The discussion that centred around the (evidently) very normalised practice of 'keeping up appearances'.
You expressed your reluctance in partaking in these periodic bouts of posturing, how they are something which feel contrived and inauthentic.
They are simply interactions which you do not enjoy.
Quizzically, who you were conversing with said, "Sorry, I'm confused," and then asked, "isn't this something that we must do and takes up most of our lives?"
What a jarring and bitter representation of idealised societal perspective.
We're supposed to put on an act except behind closed doors?
We're supposed to play an inauthentic character whenever we're in public?
We're supposed to hide what we really think or what we really feel?
This is what constitutes modern life?
We don't fit into this box but we continually (and knowingly) force ourselves in, regardless if we are cognisant of the detrimental consequences or not.
You definitely do not see this approach to life as 'living'; this is simply 'existing', and a sad existence at that.
Stepping out of this mould, or even to have some level of curiosity about what lies outside, is something that takes a lot of courage.
We are either completely blinded from the fact or scared into complete submissiveness.